Visibility Begins with Connection

Forget the Algorithm—Focus on the People

Denise Wakeman

and

Elizabeth H. Cottrell

May 23, 2025

assorted-color stickers — Photo by Mick Haupt on Unsplash

This week’s Friday Find is a guest post from

Elizabeth H. Cottrell

. I invited her to contribute for a few reasons.

Elizabeth is a dear friend, colleague, and client. A couple of years ago, she wrote a much-needed book, Heartspoken, about the near-lost art of handwritten notes. She explores the benefits of writing notes of all types: thank you, sympathy, thinking of you, special occasions, business notes, etc.

And as you’ll learn, personal note writing can also be a path to visibility in your business. It goes beyond writing personal notes.

“Sawubona” and the Secret to Being Seen

In the Zulu language, a traditional greeting—Sawubona—means “I see you.” It’s not just a polite hello. It acknowledges the other person’s worth, presence, and humanity.

As entrepreneurs, so much of our work involves trying to be seen—by potential clients, collaborators, and audiences. But here's a paradox worth remembering: the best way to increase your visibility is to help others feel seen first.

When you intentionally recognize and affirm the people around you—online or offline—you not only enrich those relationships but also naturally become more visible, more trusted, and more memorable.

Connection: Still the Most Powerful Strategy

We’re hard-wired for connection. Social scientist Brené Brown's research has shown that those with strong relationships are not only more resilient—they’re also more fulfilled. I love technology as much as the next person, but I’ve found that meaningful connection is a superpower.

When I began writing and marketing my book Heartspoken: How to Write Notes that Connect, Comfort, Encourage, and Inspire, I didn’t have a large email list or an army of followers. What I did have was a deep belief in the power of personal connection, especially through handwritten notes and thoughtful, sincere communication.

Visibility Starts with Seeing Others

Everyone wants to feel seen, heard, and valued. So, whether you're launching a product, building a brand, or nurturing a client relationship, here are simple ways to start letting others know they are seen:

Thoughtful commenting on someone’s blog or social post shows you’re paying attention.
Reposting or restacking content with your own reflection adds value and context.
Tagging someone to thank or recommend them expands their reach—and yours.
Sharing generously gives someone else the stage while positioning you as a thoughtful connector.
And yes, writing a heartspoken note—by email or snail mail—can make an unforgettable impression.

When I send a handwritten note to a podcast host, conference organizer, or a reader, I’m not doing it to be strategic. I do it because it feels right. Time and again, those gestures have led to deeper connections, surprising opportunities, and greater visibility.

One podcast invitation came directly from a note I sent after listening to a host’s episode. Another author shared my book after I sent her a thank-you for a quote I’d used. These outcomes weren’t guaranteed. But they were sparked by sincerity.

Keep It Personal—and Keep It Going

Visibility isn't a one-time event. It’s a practice of showing up with care and consistency. That means continuing to check in with people even when you’re not pitching something. It means supporting their work, celebrating their wins, and expressing genuine gratitude.

If you feel overwhelmed by online marketing, you’re not alone. But as Denise Wakeman has told us recently, you don’t have to be everywhere. You just need to show up meaningfully where it counts. And often, that starts with the people already in your circle: clients, colleagues, supporters, and friends.

When you make the time to connect, you’re building something far more enduring than a social media metric. You’re building trust and a real relationship.

A Simple Action Step

So here’s your visibility homework for the week:

Think of one person whose work you admire, who’s helped you, or who’s just shown up for you lately. Write them a short note—on paper if you can, or by email if not. Let them know why you appreciate them.

This small act of attention plants a seed. You may be surprised what will grow from that seed.

It’s a simple but effective mindset shift to stop chasing visibility and start offering it. Let’s be the ones who say, Sawubona, “I see you.”

AI Prompt for Expanding Your Visibility through Connection

Use this prompt with ChatGPT or your preferred AI writing assistant to generate a list of thoughtful, relationship-based visibility actions tailored to your business and audience:

I want to build visibility for my work by strengthening relationships instead of relying on trends or mass marketing. Please suggest a list of personalized, meaningful action steps I can take to connect with others in my field. My business or expertise focuses on [insert your topic or niche], and my target audience is [insert your ideal client/customer group]. Emphasize outreach strategies like thoughtful commenting, private messages, collaborative opportunities, or note-writing—online or offline—that will help me be seen by genuinely helping others feel seen.

💡 Example for a business coach:

“I want to build visibility for my work by strengthening relationships instead of relying on trends or mass marketing. Please suggest a list of personalized, meaningful action steps I can take to connect with others in my field. My business focuses on helping women solopreneurs streamline their operations, and my target audience is early-stage coaches and consultants. Emphasize outreach strategies like thoughtful commenting, private messages, collaborative opportunities, or note-writing—online or offline—that will help me be seen by genuinely helping others feel seen.”

Denise’s note: I experimented with Elizabeth’s prompt and came up with a fantastic list of ideas for creating more connections with my audience.

Try it and then let us know in the comment thread what ideas you get for creating more “I see you” moments.